19 days and counting

Today is day plus 81, which means there are only 19 days left until Clay and I can touch our feet on the scalding hot pavement of Las Vegas. We can play with Logan, ride go carts, play on the schools brown prickly grass and touch the hands and faces of our friends. That is the thing I am looking forward to the most, well the second thing, Logan is the first, I really miss our Logan. I can feel it now, all my friends hugging me. The hug from your spouse on a bummer day is an amazing feeling, but the hug from your bestest friend in the whole wide world seems to make everything all right. The knowledge that she is by your side encouraging you and rooting in your corner makes all the difference. I am so lucky to have several of those friends. You know who you are and I cant wait to be with you again. I cant wait to be with my family and lay down next to my kids and listen to music and fall asleep, to watch them ride their scooters, skateboards and bike on MY road in MY neighborhood. I have given myself some goals for when I get back home. First and for most I want to be a better Mom, I want to stop yelling so much and be more patient and understanding. I want to be a better listener to both the kids and Tad. I WILL stop rolling my eyes at them and be more responsive to their needs. This trail in our lives has given me time to think and has given me a chance to start over and be a better me.

Our last appt for Clay is June 20th. Since Tad cant get off work in the middle of the week we are here until the 26th. He and the kids will come and get Clay and I the following weekend. So the plan is kind of staying the same. I'm thinking of having a 100 days of celebration for Clay that Sat the 25th but I'm not sure, more info to come if we do. I think it would be a fun send off to him and a way we can all say how amazing he has done and how strong and brave he has been. It has been a long road for all of us but mostly him and he has done it with such style and grace. I am proud to have been such a huge part of it and I am grateful Tad was able to work and hold down the house in Las Vegas so I could be here to experience this miracle with Clay. Thanks Babe you are the best.

With all this going home talk and stuff its almost like he is done and cured and there are no more worries. Well that is not the case. Clay will still be on meds for the rest of his one year (next March) He still has to go to the dr twice a month and once a month in Salt Lake. He still is masked and immune compromised. He is just at a little bit less of a risk. Every 100 days he gets better. This is a long road, one that isn't over when we go home. He will be on the journey for several more years, a journey we will all be by his side for.

Once again, you are all amazing people and I love each and everyone of you,

Loves, Tab